I Didn’t Want to Share… So I Wrote This

I don’t know about you but my Instagram feed has been flooded with Cornell 7 and “I am Jane Doe” posts.

Story after story about abusive fathers, cousins, brothers, boyfriends, friends, coaches and strangers have been coming forward.

As a survivor of sibling sexual abuse, part of me wants to add my voice. Part of me wants to say… me too.

But my story isn't her story.

I didn't go through what she went through or what she's going through now. 

I didn't have to stand up against a system that was supposed to protect me and chose to protect itself instead.

Right now, she deserves the spotlight. And so do the institutions that failed her.

So I'm not here to make this about me.

I'm writing about this because what's happening feels bigger than any one of us.

Right now we’re in a time of exposure. 

Let me explain. 

We’re revealing the sick, toxic, unhealthy issues and systems that have always been inside our world.

And the issues we see are simply a reflection of the healing that is desperately needed. 

Hear me out…

I always say that healing trauma is like healing a physical wound. 

If you fall down and scrape your knee, and it gets infected, you have to go in and clean out the wound.

Cleaning the wound might be uncomfortable and it could hurt.

But once it’s cleaned, it creates an environment for real healing. 

Right now we’re in the cleaning stage.

It’s uncomfortable, it hurts, it brings up painful memories. 

But if you keep putting band-aids on it, it will only get worse.

In grad school, my favorite professor told us, “you’re only as sick as the secrets you carry.”

It’s the only quote I remember from my program because I think it was the one that resonated with me most.

In my life, when I've been the most sick, was when I held the biggest secrets.

And that’s where our world is right now. Sick and full of secrets.

But we’re not at the end of the story yet.

We’re at the point in the movie where everything goes wrong, nothing makes sense and you’re wondering if and how the hero is going to save the day.

Spoiler alter: They save the day. 

And the hero, in this case, is you.

You’re the one who can save yourself and therefore, the world. 

You’re the one who can clean out your own wounds and set an example for those around you to do the same.

Because the reality is, the world doesn’t get saved by superhero’s. 

It gets saved by ordinary people making every day decisions to live better, love more and share what they’re learned with others.

That's when real, long lasting change occurs. 

At least that’s what I try to do in my corner of the world. With hope that the ripple effect will reach far beyond where my words ever could 

So what are you doing today, in your life, to clean out your old wounds so you don’t bleed on the people who didn’t cut you?

Because that’s where it starts and that's how it will finally end.

You don't have to be a superhero to change the world. You just have to be willing to start with yourself. And you don't have to do it alone. Click here for a free discovery call.