What Does Your “Crash” Look Like?
I don’t know about you, but so far, my summer has been PACKED.
First, I spent two weeks in Florida with my partner's family. Then I flew straight to Colorado, where I co-facilitated an incredible, life-changing retreat for young adults (you can check out my last email for details on that magic 💫).
Right after that? I zipped back to Sacramento to co-facilitate another transformational experience at the Authentic Leadership Center.
All this while also:
Seeing therapy and coaching clients
Keeping up my long-distance relationship
Tending to my own physical and emotional health
And working on my upcoming book about self-healing and Parts Work 😅
I was full-on in go-mode.
Which, of course, led to the most predictable thing:
I got sick.
Classic.
When I was a kid, my mom used to call this my “go, go, go, go… CRASH” pattern. Maybe you can relate? 🙃
You push through. You show up. You give it your all.
And then the moment you pause… your body collapses.
But this time, when the crash happened—(sobbing in my car at a gas station, sniffling and overwhelmed, while talking to my partner on the phone)—something different showed up.
My INNER CRITIC. Loud and proud.
Usually when I get sick or hit a wall, I’m able to meet myself with some compassion. I know I’ve been doing a lot, and I can usually say, “Okay, it’s time to rest.”
But this time?
That internal voice had a lot to say:
“You should be able to handle this.”
“You should have managed your calendar better.”
“You shouldn’t be canceling anything—you made a commitment!”
“You should have seen this coming. You should have known better.”
My critic is so relentlessly critical that it judged me both for doing too much and for thinking I could handle it all. 🤦🏻♀️
Ever feel like you can’t win, no matter what you do? That’s the Inner Critic in action.
It’s exhausting. And honestly? It’s so common—especially for high-achievers, caregivers, and recovering perfectionists.
So, what did I do?
At first, I let myself feel it all.
I cried. I spiraled a little. I let the fog of “shoulds” wash over me. I didn’t rush to fix or reframe it.
And then, once my nervous system calmed down, I was finally able to hear a different voice.
A wiser part of me. A grounded, loving, Adult Self part that gently reminded me:
“You’re human. It’s okay to get sick.
It’s okay to get tired.
It’s okay to not follow through on everything.
You’re doing your BEST. And your best is ENOUGH.”
That shift—from shame to self-compassion—is everything.
After that, I turned my phone on Do Not Disturb, climbed into bed, binge-watched some cheesy comfort TV, and gave myself the day off.
Guess what? I woke up the next morning feeling refreshed and healthy. 💪
It was yet another reminder that sometimes, your body knows best.
But let’s be real—it’s hard to access that inner wisdom when we’re stuck in patterns of overthinking, over-functioning, and self-judgment.
That’s why I created a free resource that I think you’re really going to love:
🎁 5 Steps to Befriending Your Inner Critic
It’s a gentle guide to help you shift out of self-attack and into self-trust—without pretending the critic doesn’t exist.
This is for you if:
You’ve been pushing through burnout and need a reset
You’re exhausted but feel guilty taking a break
You often judge yourself for “not doing enough”
You know your Inner Critic is running the show—and you're ready to change that
You’re on a healing journey and want practical tools that actually work
In this free guide, you’ll learn:
✔️ Where your Inner Critic really comes from
✔️ How to separate from that harsh voice without rejecting it
✔️ Simple, body-based tools for nervous system regulation
✔️ A process for re-centering your Adult Self
✔️ A new relationship to self-care that honors your humanity
This is about more than just mindset. It’s about healing from the inside out.
Because when you understand your inner parts—especially the loud, protective ones—you stop battling with yourself. And that’s when real peace becomes possible.
👉 Click here to download 5 Steps to Befriending Your Inner Critic
Oh—and one more thing:
If you’re feeling totally wiped, burned out, overwhelmed, or just... done, consider this your permission slip to take a rest day.
You do not need to earn it.
You do not need to explain it.
You are allowed to care for yourself, even if the to-do list is still full.
Because the truth is: you can’t give what you don’t have.
Take care of you—so you can keep showing up where you’re needed most. 💜
And if you love the guide, forward it to a friend who might need a reminder that they’re enough, too.
Let’s keep healing loudly, together.